Take a moment to heal by pausing and thinking about how much time has passed since an event like this has happened in your life, and how much have you missed in life because you haven‘t learned from the mistake of harboring regret. Then detach yourself from it by just choosing to live with my favorite three words ―Let It Go! By taking that one step, you will allow yourself to grow and thrive and be fulfilled because of the opportunities that you find in life. Wouldn‘t it make sense to just let it go, forget it, check it off as experience? Or just say to yourself ―everybody makes mistakes, that‘s just part of life, and then move on.

If the answer is yes, then why is it so hard for so many people to do just that? It is typical of human behavior to focus on the past instead of forward-thinking philosophy. Humans, without self-discipline, will often take the road of least resistance, meaning it is easier to hold on to what is hurting us than to go to a place that is unknown. We spend too much time worrying about what others think of us, when in reality, people have other things to think about than us! Are you ready to accept that there is a better way and a better life for you?

(Final section will be posted tomorrow)

The Good Life Rules!

Bryan Dodge

The Rewards of Submission

This is perhaps one of the most challenging subject matters that I have ever written about. The reason I have not given up on addressing this subject is because I believe it is one of those “cutting edge” differences that separate success from failure and high achievers from average performers.

This subject is not a popular one, but I believe it is integral to one’s success. The reason it’s not popular is because it is a discipline. Every discipline has a corresponding freedom and benefit. The purpose of a discipline is the benefit. Our aim, e.g., freedom, assurance, or reward, is the benefit and not the discipline. The discipline is for realizing the greater good. This article is about submission. We don’t want to simply look at submission, but rather we want to realize the freedom or benefit it brings.

What freedom corresponds to submission? In my opinion, it is the ability to lay down the burden of always needing to get our own way. The obsession of demanding that we always get our way is one of the greatest hindrances in relationships. In the discipline of submission, we must release the matter from our own universe and forget about it. Frankly, most issues in life are not as big as they first appear in our psyche. We convince ourselves that a critical issue is at stake; usually it is not. This is what causes most “office politics” problems or hard feelings within an organization. Only in submission can we bring a self-serving spirit to a place where it no longer controls us. Only submission can free us sufficiently to enable us to distinguish between genuine issues and stubborn self- will.

Submission is an ethical theme. It is a position obligator that says: I value other people. I value my co-workers. I count others as good as or better than myself.

I hold others’ interests above my own. I always think well and highly of others. I look for the good in other people.

The real issue is the spirit of consideration and respect we have for each other.

By taking this approach, we enter into a new, wonderful, and glorious freedom – the freedom to give up our own rights for the good of others. For the first time, we can then accept people unconditionally. It means, we set ourselves free from the destructive anger and bitterness we feel when someone doesn’t act toward us the way we think they should. I once had a manager often encourage us to be cohesive when he was attempting to accomplish a team spirit around a project or deadline. I don’t know of a better way to gain cohesiveness than to practice the discipline of submission. The reward for good service, such as submitting to the needs of customers, will bring financial stability and longevity.

In conclusion, let me mention one more phenomenon that may be racing through your mind, and that is the matter of identity. Submission does not mean the loss of our identity, as one might think. The opposite is true; submission will exalt. Submission will catapult a person’s success faster than anything. An employee who serves well and submits to his employer will receive honors, favors, and promotions by that employer. A person who submits to a system will get promoted by that system. Submission, like all disciplines, will reward those who serve.

Frank Massine

Vice President, Dodge Development, Inc.

Why We Must Connect With Others

It is important to remember that we are human beings. And being human, it is important to realize that we are designed to connect with others. It is the separation of that design that removes the happiness and fulfillment that we all need. It is that connection that allows you to live The Good Life. It is not our calling to go about our lives focused only on what we do at work, and then try to fit our personal lives into the cracks of the day.

I truly have a passion for what I do, and I’m focused on my mission in life. I want to help build a better world by helping you build a better you, one person at a time. I want to THANK YOU for all that you have done to help me accomplish this goal. So many of you have supported me through all the years and you play an important role in my life. I’m very THANKFUL to have a special connection with you.

Our capacity for love, affection, warmth, and friendship are rich and reliable sources of human happiness. The key is to transform the “I” and “U” in our lives into “We.” Evolving our lives to a higher level allows us to cultivate a sense of belonging that brings rich rewards of human satisfaction, along with better physical, mental, and emotional health. The key is to connect with others.

Connecting with the human race helps to strengthen the wider community and is vital to building a better you.

The Good life Rules!

Bryan J. Dodge

Listening is a skill that will give you the edge over your competition. In most cases, we should spend about 75 percent of our time listening, 10 percent of our time thinking about what we’ve heard, and 5 percent of our time talking. Now, you probably notice that this doesn’t add up to 100 percent. The remaining 10 percent is the time you should be spending listening to your inner voice, intuition, and heart. Communication gurus tell us if you’re talking 50 percent of the time in a conversation, you’re talking too much and not listening enough.

Your ability to listen builds trust. There are two questions that must be answered before anybody will do business with you. Do they trust you? And, do they like you? Listening contains the keys to answering both questions. Studies have shown that miscommunication occurs largely because we do not take the time to listen. Alexander Pope, the famous eighteenth century English poet once said, “Some people never learn anything because they understand everything too soon.” One of the deepest needs people have is to be heard and understood.

Listening effectively is not easy. It requires what people lack most; time, patience, and total concentration. People will judge you on how much you care about them by your attention level. If you only hear a person’s words and not listen, you lose credibility and diminish trust. Here are some specific skills required to becoming a better listener:

• Focus on looking squarely in one eye of the person. Yes, one eye. This little trick subconsciously blocks out distractions and gives the person your total attention, and that is essential. Try it. It works.
• Don’t just sit there! Interrupt them when you lose focus and get back on track before you become lost. By the way, they know when you are getting lost!
• Ask good questions. Questions are like objections; they show that you have interest.
• Recap. Sum up the main points as you go along to make sure you understand what has been said.
• Don’t finish the other person thoughts, even though you may get their point.

And always remember, “Other people judge how much you care by how attentive you are.” So, when you are where you are, be there.

The Good Life Rules!
Bryan J. Dodge

Leaders and Paperwork

It was a critical time during World War II. General Douglas MacArthur and his troops were camped at the side of a big river, and they had to cross it. MacArthur called in his engineer and said, “Soldier, how long will it take you to throw a bridge across this river?” The engineer replied, “Three days.” MacArthur said, “Good, have your draftsman draw up plans immediately.” Three days later, MacArthur called the engineer back into his office to ask how the bridge was coming along. “Sir,” replied the engineer, “the bridge is finished, and you can take your troops across now provided you don’t have to wait for the plans. They’re not done yet.”

The moral of this story is to keep your focus on the project and don’t get distracted with paperwork and other unimportant activities. The engineer demonstrated great leadership skills because he focused on the project of building the bridge and did not get bogged down in paperwork. High achievers and great leaders do just that. They hire others to do the paperwork and they stay focused on the business of running the company and on the important things like customer satisfaction, sales, and the general growth of the business.

The biggest time saver in dealing with paperwork is to handle a piece of paper only once. Complete it, delegate it, or throw it away. Leaders don’t get bogged down in paperwork. Like the engineer, leaders focus their energy and talent on building.

Frank Massine
Vice President, Dodge Development, Inc.