Then here is the first of eight steps you must take in my new program called Living Forward in Life. Learn to laugh sooner; laugh about your mistakes in life. Learn from your mistakes. When you can say to your friends ―Do you remember when… and everybody laughs and it‘s okay, then you are able to move forward. The key is to not wait for months or years or even a lifetime before you arrive at that point. Move the laughter forward and your life will move forward in a very positive way. Just let it go and set yourself free to experience the true abundance that was meant for you. That is my goal: to help you build a better you, one day at a time.

The Good Life Rules!

Bryan Dodge

Seven Aspects of Leadership

While rereading John Maxwell’s book, “The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership,” I came across a list of seven key areas that reveal if a leader is truly respected. I found them a great summary and would like to review them with you.

Character – If you go to www.bryandodge.com and review all of the archived e-Zine articles on leadership, you will observe that we wrote many of them about the different character traits of an effective leader. Leadership is all about character, the inner person. What makes a leader act? What are the leader’s true motives? What a leader does in their personal life determines their character. What is the depth of a leader’s character? Keep this in mind when you cast your presidential vote in November. It is all about who they are inside when no one is watching.

Relationship – Loners don’t make good leaders. Great leaders build deep relationships with many people. I remember reading a story one time about a banker in a town that had a rolodex full of names. Any time someone in that town had a problem or needed something, people would go to him and he would connect them with someone that could help them out. He was a town leader simply because he had built relationships with so many people. When he picked up the phone, people responded to him. Leadership is about the number of relationships they have built. Who do they know?

Knowledge – There are three kinds of knowledge on any matter: past, present and future. When my church hired a new pastor, I remember how he came in and studied the past history of our 21 year old church. He then had a town hall meeting to discuss what was on the hearts and minds of the members of the congregation. Only after he assessed the current situation, did he cast a vision for the future of the church. You see he had the wisdom to make himself knowledgeable about the past and current situation before he formed a vision of where the church was to go. Had he just stepped in and done his own thing, many of the members would have left. Information is vital to a leader. What do they learn for themselves?

Intuition – All great leaders have it. It is an ability to read a situation. Some people are born with it but you can acquire it with experience. It is the talent to trust your gut feelings. It is a keen understanding that you can’t always explain. It is a reception you can act on. Call it a premonition. It is an intangible asset that is hard to measure but it is invaluable when it comes to making quick decisions. It is the ability to act on a hunch. In what areas of your life do you have a strong intuition?

Experience – Not the experience of just being there, but the experience of producing positive results in a situation. The greater the problems you have solved in the past gives people the confidence to trust you to lead in the future. It is where you have been and in what areas you have demonstrated genuine know-how.

Past Success – I can’t help but think of the current presidential elections. The first area people scrutinize is a candidate’s track record. What have they done that would make them worthy of leading the most powerful nation on this planet? What kind of challenges have they exposed themselves to and succeeded? What have they done?

Ability – Whether it is a natural talent they were born with, education they acquired, or skills they have learned, leadership is still about demonstrating one’s capabilities. People will listen to you and follow you as long as you deliver. It is all about continuous accomplishment.

The irony of leadership is that it can be lost as well as gained. Leadership has no guarantee of permanency. Once you have gained a position of leadership, you must keep honing all of these areas to maintain the position. As soon as people believe you have stopped growing and stopped delivering, they will stop listening. When people stop listening, they’ll no longer follow your leadership.

Frank Massine
Dodge Development, Inc.

Define what’s good and bad—for you.

Let me say that I’m not some Puritan that thinks you shouldn’t enjoy yourself over a beer or cigar. That’s really, really not the point of what I’m saying here in this article. I want you to define your habits yourself. For me, the habits that control you—the ones you can’t easily get away from—are the bad ones. I could tell you a dozen stories about drug and alcohol addiction, but I believe you already know that these habits will destroy you and everything and everyone around you. It’s the subtle habits that can sneak up on you.

When I got my company up and running at full speed, we decided we wanted to fulfill a long-time dream and move to a house on a lake. We found the perfect spot in Lucas, Texas. I could hook my boat up to the truck and be on the water five minutes after leaving my driveway. But for the first six years we lived in Lucas, I don’t think I got to the lake more than six times total. My office was on a direct line between the airport and the house, and I’d make it habit to stop and check just one more thing at the office when I came home from a trip.

That “one more thing” usually became two or three more things, and I routinely rolled in at seven or eight at night. Working too hard—or too inefficiently—is definitely a bad habit. I finally got the message from my wife, who asked me one night why we even bothered to move to the lake since we never saw it. Afterward having this heart to heart discussion with my wife, I moved my office so that it was in the complete opposite direction of the airport. We saved up some money and bought a new ski boat, and I committed myself to be home in the afternoons when my kids got back from school so we could go skiing. In the summer, we’re on the lake three to four days a week.

To assess your own habits, you’ve got to be honest with yourself. You might have something you’ve been doing in your day-to-day life that was “okay” for a long time because you were younger, stronger, or more focused. How you eat is a great example. Your metabolism changes as you get older, and just because you consider yourself a healthy eater—for a 35-year-old—doesn’t mean you’re going to be a healthy 50-year-old. If you don’t monitor your habits, those sandwiches you eat for lunch when you’re 30 and fit could turn you into a chubby middle-aged person.

By taking care not to let your habits control you, you will do a better job keeping your life in balance and in proportion. It’s not about eliminating all the things you enjoy out of your life and following some grim no-fun plan. I like wasting time as much as anybody. I’ve just figured out a mix of habits that works for me.

Let me use alcohol as an example. I’ve got some serious alcoholism in my family, and I know that “drowning my tears in my beer” is something that would get me into trouble pretty fast. But I don’t believe that making a rule that I won’t ever go to Germany and enjoy a beer at Oktoberfest, or taste a fantastic wine from a friend’s cellar is the solution. I could be a regular drinker and get to the point where I was going to have to take the drastic step of cutting all alcohol from my life—like some of my friends have had to do. Or, I could be honest with myself about my limitations, and set a system in place that would allow me to enjoy myself in moderation. I decided to eliminate hard liquor from my life and restricted my drinking to “non-school” nights—Friday and Saturday. You know sometimes the greatest control of a habit is understanding that you might lose the opportunity to enjoy it if you don’t manage it.

The key to the Good Life is to stay in control of your habits so they don’t control you and force you to do something drastic later. People develop diabetes in their middle-age years partially because they couldn’t control their intake of food. Would you rather eat an extra slice of pie now or stop eating it forever when you’re 55? To me, it’s an easy choice.

But the truth is that the opportunities that make it so easy for us to live in America also make it easy to keep a hold of whatever habits we have. No society in the history of the world has had as much access to food as we do right now. Grocery stores are bursting with every kind of food you could imagine—and some our parents even couldn’t imagine, thanks to food science. And while it’s great that frozen food can remain edible for months and your kids can enjoy green ketchup if that’s what they really want, millions of people in this country are obese because their idea of a meal is something you pick up at a fast food restaurant.

The second part of that equation is the fact that we just don’t need to expend as much energy to live as we used to. We spend the majority of our lives in cars, planes and elevators. A lot of people aren’t even doing something as simple as walking behind a lawn mower anymore.

This might explain what’s happening to many people today, but I don’t think these are valid excuses. Not any legitimate ones, anyway. As I said, The Good Life is about gaining control over your life and habits are one area you can focus on. Do you want to change those habits? Do you wish you could quit habits that waste your time, hurt your health, or otherwise get in the way of The Good Life? Regardless of your motivation, if you want to work on your habits, make sure you read next month’s e-Zine. The main topic will be “Building a Better You by Choosing Your Habits.” I will show you how to make the process less of a struggle for you and how you can help others as well.

Thanks for all your support. I hope you make it a habit to listen to my radio show each Saturday on WBAP 820 AM at 5:00 pm. This is our second season! You can listen to online—just go to www.bryandodge.com and click on the WBAP link to Listen Live. Feel free to call in with your questions or your feedback or if you just want to promote
your business. Thanks for being you.

The Good life Rules – 48 hours at a time!

Bryan J. Dodge

Guest Post: Step 2 Find Your Passion

What do you want to be, do, and have?

My mentor, Zig Ziglar, says, “You’ve got to be before you can do, and do before you can have.” In other words, having what you want is not as easy as snapping your fingers. First you have to do the work (e.g., learn how to play the saxophone or go through the necessary training to become a nurse/dancer/lawyer/fireman/professor, etc.).

We transform the “being” into “becoming” by turning our work into accomplishments.

Questions to ask yourself:

• What are you doing today to be that person you want to be?
• Are the actions you’re taking today leading you toward or away from your goals?
• How much time do you spend reading about successful people versus watching television?

The fact that you are reading this article tells me that you want more for your life and you are willing to do what it takes to make it happen.

Michelle Prince

“Winning in Life Now”

Breaking Through Part I

Anyone that said 2009 didn’t effect them are lying to themselves. We all face disappointments and setbacks. Life is full of times when we get knocked down. Staying in the past or breaking through for a better tomorrow is your choice. The ones that don’t break through sit there and settle for less than their very best. But if we are going to achieve our full potential we’ve got to break through with the mentally of a winner. You can say woo is me, or you could say yes it’s up to me.

In 2009 too many people didn’t put forth their best effort, and it’s officially caught up with us. We became complacent in our jobs and in our lives. We stopped getting inspired. We stopped pursuing greatness. Today isn’t about yesterday, today is about tomorrow. Learn from your mistakes, and then let them go. Then you can officially embrace the true opportunities of tomorrow.

What types of things have you learned?